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The forum you are about to enter is coed, but until the For Young Men Only book was released, September 16, 2008, it’s been dominated by the alien gender. Discussions have centered on a variety of topics including the companion book for teen girls, For Young Women Only. We hope this forum will provide answers to questions, advice, and explanations, in a way that will help you understand the opposite sex better. Young Men…enter at your own risk!

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Forums > Teen Online Forums > Advice From Fellow Readers
Subject: Guys and THE guy...
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1 Peter 3:3User is Offline

Posts:18
07/20/2010 5:53 PM  
Hey. Here's the thing... I've gone out with a few guys and just about every one of them has ended up hurting me in some way or fashion. Now I'm with this great guy who I am praying about and for and I'm the one who's making him upset. He keeps reassuring me that he's not like other guys and that he's tired of girls expecting him to mess up. I don't know how to open up to him as much as he wants me to. I'm a deep christian girl who loves the Lord with all I am and so does he. I just don't know what to do or feel! I'm praying for guidence. Thoughts, advice, and prayers are greatly appreciated!
ruger414User is Offline

Posts:0
07/20/2010 6:20 PM  
I have never been in a situation like this, but you should give him a chance to prove himself and try to get him to open up to you before you do for him. does that make sense? Sometimes it's hard to make things sound the way you want them to when you are typing them out.


Well there is my two cents. hope it helps.
1 Peter 3:3User is Offline

Posts:18
07/20/2010 9:12 PM  
That actually makes alot of sense! Thanks!
JoJoUser is Offline

Posts:1657
07/21/2010 7:02 AM  
yeah good idea, but also maybe sit him down and talk to him about how you've been hurt before, and though you're not expecting him to mess up, you're not ready to be as open as before as you need to get your confidence in guys in general back up.
for an example, a girl who's been taken advantage of might take years to be able to trust guys again... its similar to you, but it's not as drastic if that makes sense
Turn up the music
Turn it up loud
Take a few chances
Let it all out
'Cause you won't regret it
Lookin' back from where you have been
'Cause it's not who you knew
And it's not what you did
It's how you live

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
God Bless!
Mwah XOXO
JoJo
AdelynnUser is Offline

Posts:516
07/21/2010 8:14 AM  
Obviously it's important not to be closed off to him, but it's also important to keep boundaries. Even if you are both seriously committed tot his relationship, you aren't married. Don't force it! When you've both had enough time to become comfortable, you'll work it out. There is no rush to share everything with someone you aren't married to- especially because there is a direct link between emotional intimacy and physical intimacy, and God made the guidelines for sexual purity both clear and for our benefit =]
"Angel of Mercy, how did you find me? How did you pick me up again? Angel of Mercy, how did you move me, why am I on my feet again?" -One Republic
1 Peter 3:3User is Offline

Posts:18
07/21/2010 1:47 PM  
That makes so much sense. Thank you for your comments! I'm new to this website and I love it already. You all give such great advice! lol Thanks again and God bless you all!
nateynateUser is Offline

Posts:316
07/22/2010 3:58 PM  
Dont judge him off of standards that you set becasue of your ex's that can get annoying for a guy just give him a chance to prove yourself
" Wake up oh my soul
wake up and praise the Lord
rise up you sleepy soul
rise up and praise the Lord"

Enter Your Gates
nateynateUser is Offline

Posts:316
07/22/2010 3:59 PM  
Dont judge him off of standards that you set becasue of your ex's that can get annoying for a guy just give him a chance to prove himself

" Wake up oh my soul
wake up and praise the Lord
rise up you sleepy soul
rise up and praise the Lord"

Enter Your Gates
dc_88keys4christUser is Offline

Posts:0
12/15/2010 1:44 AM  
Make it clear to him that you appreciate him for who he is, and maybe mention that you admire (specific ways) that his love for God is evident in his life.
1 Peter 3:3User is Offline

Posts:18
12/21/2010 5:32 PM  
Darcie... That is GREAT ADVICE! lol I don't know why I haven't thought about that before. I guess I've been so caught up in the IDEA of him that I didn't even look back to God. But I will deffinately put your advice into actions! Thanks again! lol
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