Austin
Posts:49
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| 01/10/2009 8:36 PM |
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| Hey this is for you girls out there!
I seek advice for a real life situation. I asked a girl on a date sunday and we went and watched a movie. Both of us had a great time and she seems to like me. I'm a confident guy and I know I'm supposed to pursue her, and I do. We go to different schools so we don't see each other extremely often, so I call her or text her like every day. We are not officially dating, but I want to. I plan to take her out again, but I'm sick now so it might be a while. Anyway, I was wondering if there is some kind of limit to how much I should talk to her. Is everyday a bad thing? Would that be too forward, maybe?.........talk to me! |
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God is HUGE, and he loves me. |
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Faith!
Posts:1
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| 01/10/2009 8:44 PM |
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| ok well i was in a similar situation on the girls end. i met this guy and he started texting me everyday and getting to know him was really enjoyable. i think that a lot of girls would be happy to know someone is that interested in getting to know them or just to talk to them. at least i was like it. i look forward to talking to him every day and now we are dating and in a really good relationship so i would keep doing what you are doing. |
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artyprincess
Posts:226
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| 01/10/2009 9:36 PM |
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| Yeah, if she likes you a lot, she'll enjoy talking to you a lot! Maybe don't make it an everyday thing, so that if you miss a day, she won't be wondering what happened. My guess, anyway. |
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God Can. |
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JoJo
Posts:1670
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| 01/11/2009 4:30 AM |
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~hmmm good point artyprincess~
But yeah, if I was the girl, id probably be sitting by my phone waiting till you called/texted.
It's weird cuz when I like a guy i often try to get to know him and text him and stuff (or message them on facebook etc) but yeah, guys dont seem to reply too often, and it can send really mixed signals. If you do miss a day txting her etc, maybe the next day say "Sorry I didnt txt yesterday, I was busy..." at least she'll know you did want to talk to her... |
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Turn up the music
Turn it up loud
Take a few chances
Let it all out
'Cause you won't regret it
Lookin' back from where you have been
'Cause it's not who you knew
And it's not what you did
It's how you live
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
God Bless!
Mwah XOXO
JoJo |
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Austin
Posts:49
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| 01/11/2009 1:55 PM |
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| Thanks for the input! It really helps me out. |
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God is HUGE, and he loves me. |
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emilyjanelle
Posts:510
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| 01/11/2009 9:41 PM |
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i agree with everybody else.
just make sure you're sure, that you're sure, that you're ready for this. from hindsight, you don't want to get into something, then back out when the going get's tough (because you didn't know her well enough) and leave her heartbroken. |
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You may as well come quiet.
- Police Maxim |
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Sandy
Posts:48
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| 01/11/2009 9:55 PM |
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Emily's got a point. Don't pursue it unless you're positive. You both may get hurt. |
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Austin
Posts:49
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| 01/11/2009 10:11 PM |
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I never really thought about that. Or maybe subconsciously I did. Call me old fashioned but I like to get to know the girl first by asking her out on individual dates instead of simply "asking her out". And getting to know her is top on my list. I talk to her just for that purpose  . |
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God is HUGE, and he loves me. |
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smartblonde77
Posts:122
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| 01/11/2009 10:28 PM |
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I don't really know about that but my best friend and i talk like everyday over text!
So i dont mind but i think it is a very personal thing some girls are like wow wayyyyyy to much and some will go not enough! so it really depends on how much she likes you! if i like a guy i'm like gosh we haven't talked today!!! so it really depends on the girl! |
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~Krista
it's kinda crazy how time has a way of makein all these memories fade away so if theres only one thing you remember bout me remember that i loved you unconditionally! |
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JoJo
Posts:1670
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| 01/12/2009 3:42 AM |
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yeah, it does depend on the girl. and her age would also play into factor...
like is she in that "Boy Crazy" stage. or what??
Like for me, Im at a point where I want to start getting to know my future husband, so thats my primary focus with relationships with guys. (besides having God totally involved" But Im almost 20, so Im not saying everyone is thinking the same as me...  |
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Turn up the music
Turn it up loud
Take a few chances
Let it all out
'Cause you won't regret it
Lookin' back from where you have been
'Cause it's not who you knew
And it's not what you did
It's how you live
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
God Bless!
Mwah XOXO
JoJo |
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Austin
Posts:49
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| 01/12/2009 7:36 AM |
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| Well she is 17 years old (same as me) and she is definitely not boy crazy. She is the most God-fearing girl I know. She's one of the most mature as well. |
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God is HUGE, and he loves me. |
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emilyjanelle
Posts:510
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| 01/12/2009 8:59 AM |
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yeah austin, then think (in other words, pray) about it, HARD.
in my personal opinion, i would rather not have guys asking me out on individual dates just for the purpose of getting to know me. i would rather he get to know me as a friend first and foremost, in "friend settings". such as, out to eat with our families instead of alone, a movie with friends instead of alone, etc. there's more pressure to "act" a certain way when you know that it's a date, instead of just hanging with a friend, y'know? |
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You may as well come quiet.
- Police Maxim |
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Austin
Posts:49
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| 01/12/2009 5:39 PM |
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I am praying about it for sure.
And I can see what you mean, Emily. We have known each other for a while, and I had gotten to know her a little. I want to know her more, so I talk to her over the phone. She is always so busy that I can't hang out with her much, so I call her. When we do hang out, I kinda just want it to be one on one because then we actually get to spend time together. You know what I mean? I gues we would just be hanging out among friends if we saw each other more often. The last thing I want to do is break her heart, so I am definitely taking it slow. |
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God is HUGE, and he loves me. |
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Locke
Posts:223
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| 01/14/2009 1:56 PM |
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Speaking from a 'slightly' older perspective (I'm 22), you get a better perspective and reality check when you and whoever you're interested in see each other in real life situations - how they handle life with their parents, do they teach a Sunday School class, do they help out in the back rooms with the kid's group, etc. And talk to that person while you're doing it. 
One on one dates are nice if you're looking for something romantic, but relationships are so much more if they're shared (no, I DON'T mean multiple girlfriends :pp) - that is, if you and your girlfriend/boyfriend are actively investing time in your friendships, both individually and together.
Since I veered from the original post so much, here's my thoughts on that - start slow, and build your way up texting/calling/otherwise talking to her until she seems to back off a little. Don't be clingy, girls usually hate that. For example, I once had a very close female friend who would text me when she got up in the morning, at random times during the day, and before she went to bed - she could and did like to talk throughout the whole day. But the girl you like may be different, so observation is key. |
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It is trifles that make the sum of life. |
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emilyjanelle
Posts:510
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| 01/14/2009 2:25 PM |
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| william, i think you may have some competition with the advice on here, haha... :p |
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You may as well come quiet.
- Police Maxim |
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daughteroftheking
Posts:3
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| 01/14/2009 4:57 PM |
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| ya like emilyjanelle said, get to know eachother in a friend setting first. your relationship will be soooo much stronger. and maybe try asking her if she minds you talking to her every day... |
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Adelynn
Posts:189
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| 01/14/2009 5:08 PM |
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| DaughterOfTheKing is so right, ask her! |
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"... I will pour out my Spirit upon all people. Your sons and daughters will prophesy..." Acts 2.17
What If His People Prayed? |
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Mike
Posts:89
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| 01/16/2009 9:26 PM |
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Yes, ask her.
It also depends on whether she's introverted or extroverted. If she's introverted she'll enjoy talking to you but would rather have some days she didn't have to talk to you so that she can recharge. If she's extroverted, she'd probably like to talk to you most every day because that's how she'd recharge.
In either case though, every day can be seen as obsessive, but it's really between you two. Discuss it.
By the way though, it might be better to call than to text. I don't doubt your communication skills, but you'll improve your skills more by talking than by texting.
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wind_dancer
Posts:26
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| 01/17/2009 1:14 PM |
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Just make sure that you're not obsessive, because that is just annoying and shows her that you aren't confident as your own person but that you are dependent on other people for your happiness. Plus its not good for you.
****Riah**** |
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***Casting all your cares upon Him, for He careth for you. 1 Peter 5:7*** |
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emilyjanelle
Posts:510
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| 01/17/2009 8:01 PM |
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| good thoughts, riah. that's very true. if a guy starts calling me day after day after day, i'll probably start questioning, "wow, does he even have a life?" |
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You may as well come quiet.
- Police Maxim |
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